Showing posts with label mothers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mothers. Show all posts

Sunday, May 11, 2008

To my Mothers'

Graduation 015

Today is a day in which most people celebrate the woman who raised them, and nutured them through their childhood and into adulthood.

For me this day is more about the group of women who shaped who I am and who I am becoming today not my mother.

All through my childhood, I didn't get along real well with my mother, and it went drastically downhill the year my sister was born, and my uncle and grandfather died(her brother and father). For me that was a turning point in our relationship we went from being mother and daughter to sworn enemies(and I was only 7 mind you). This trend continued for years right up to and through High school. Now we are getting back into a more 'traditional' mother daughter relationship but it is and will take time, and honestly may never be 'normal'.

So back to the women who are my Mothers'. I cannot stress how much I admire, respect, and value these women and what they taught me. If it weren't for some of them I may not of even made it through high school.

I remember when I started high school how alone, and scared I felt, feeling out of my skin and exposed to a whole new world. I found my rocks, and touchstones in these women. I cannot even truly express the gratitude I feel toward them.

The best I can do is give you an example.

So throughout my freshman, and sophomore year I struggled in my classes and didn't feel motivated to learn. I turned to one of the women and confided in her my issues(she already knew most of them as we were quite close), and we sat and discussed the problem me revealing the fear that if something didn't change drastically that I would end up dropping out because I hated school so much at that point. She and I came up with the solution that I should apply for the 'alternative school'(AS) and see how that would work out. We both recognized that my mother would NOT approve of this move, so we worked very closely with my dad, getting all the paperwork through and approved, except for the interview portion of the process.

School ended, I went off and did my summer activities met the ex, had my accident, forgot about the whole AS thing. That is until one day shortly after my accident when we got a call that I needed to come in and do my interview. Up until that point my mother had remained in the dark, at the point that she found out about my 'change' in schooling she blew every bit of cool out of the water, and called me every bad name you can call a girl under the sun to my face. Needless to say I was DEVASTATED. So I went in did my interview and was accepted into the AS.

School started and I settled in and LOVED the new enviroment. Though I never could really push her words out of my head, so 'my mothers' stepped up to the plate to give me that extra nudge of self esteem that I needed, supporting me through that year and into the next. With their support I thrived in school making up my missed credits and actually getting ahead in my studies. Thanks to them I was able to feel comfortable in my decision and not spend 2 years second guessing if I 'did the right thing'.

If it weren't for them I don't think I'd have half the courage that I do today. I know now that they were wiser and smarter on some issues *ahem*my ex*ahem* and that maybe I should of listened to them but they still have supported me even now(we are still quite close).

So today I would like to dedicate my mothers day to them. The women who saved me from me. Thank you!

Monday, April 28, 2008

And the award goes to

So since I don't have any awards for my blog currently and didn't feel like going and stealing one from somewhere, to award my new favorite blog, I figured I'd make one up. I have no clue how acceptable this is but I'm sure that they won't turn down a blog award(cause really who would)?

I'd like to introduce the Smokin' Hot Blog Award.

smokinhotblogaward

There is only one real 'rule' for this award. It should be given to a blogger who makes you laugh/snort/chuckle, on a regular basis.

Now without further ado, I'd like to hereby present my new award to

*Drum Roll*

Law Student Hot Mama

Are you reading her blog yet? No? Well why the heck not?

She is seriously funny and when she recently went on 'vacation' I missed her witty blog so much that I kept re-reading her feeds. Make sure you check out her T.I.T's  series she runs every Tuesday that is guaranteed to make you at least a little peeved about something.

Monday, January 21, 2008

M...m...Mondays

for the record I HATE mondays. with a passion.

especially the ones where they are holidays and everyone stays home. our schedule gets thrown off and the girl WILL NOT sleep. than there is that annoying creature who throws melodramatic hissy fits because 'life isn't fair' *rolls eyes* well DUH! it isn't fair now suck it up and get over it. I swear to goodness I wish that i could just lock her up in a small cage and let her suffer. I am tired of her waking kenzie and not being held responsible for it.

*pauses* hold on a second i'm going to go on a rant about what i am tired of:

I am tired of:
  • annoying teenage sisters
  • people who scream at the top of their lungs and wake kenzie
  • getting in trouble for yelling at them when they wake kenzie cause i JUST GOT HER TO SLEEP
  • living with my parents(sadly its the only thing i can afford)
  • not having my car so i can go out when i want to
  • not having a job so i get more human contact
  • my mother who is a complete and utter witch
  • my sister whom is a spoiled little brat- seriously
  • people telling me that my hair makes me look like a 'goth' uh no it doesnt
Okay i think thats it for the moment. okay am off now

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Mother's little speech book

So today I realized that I really truely am turning into a MOTHER(you notice i dont say MY mother as she and i have a rocky relationship at best).

This evening I got a call from a friend we'll call Ali. Now normally Ali doesn't call me that often but she had called me earlier today returning one of my stalkerish phone calls(mind you we've known each other for 8 years so this is just a joke). Well we had a nice long converstation about nothing really in general yet everything at the same time(again this is just how we operate). Well later this evening I was sitting feeding munch the last of her dinner when my phone started buzzing at me. I looked down to find that Ali was calling me. I answered it to her in tears. I won't go into details as to what had upset her so but I will say that by the end of our conversation she had accused me of hanging out with her mother(who lives 4 states away). Apparently I told her the EXACT same things her mom did when she spoke to her on the phone only moments before calling me.

I mean I know that I have been a mother for almost two years but it always surprises me how many motherly instincts that I have since I had to create my own 'mothers' when I was growing up.